How to Determine if Someone Is Being Deceptive?

While stepping off the bus and walking towards the house, you can’t help but notice the perfect weather today. The sun is shining, there’s a pleasant breeze, and the temperature is just right. You’re excited to grab a snack and then go play outside with your friends.

As you search the refrigerator for a delicious treat, your mom informs you that you can’t go outside to play until you finish your homework. Uh oh! You know you have a pile of homework waiting for you, but you really want to spend time with your friends.

You turn around slowly, glance to your right, and confidently say, “I finished all my homework at school! See you later!” Unfortunately, your mom has a keen eye for deception and immediately detects that you’ve just told her a little lie.

As you head to your bedroom to start on your homework, you wonder how she was able to tell that you were lying. Does your mom have a surveillance camera in your classroom? Did the teacher call home to inform her about your homework? Probably not!

Instead, your deceit was likely evident in your facial expressions. It may have even been noticeable in your tone of voice, body language, or gestures. Although moms are particularly skilled at detecting lies, almost anyone can learn to identify some of the telltale signs of deceit.

You don’t need a lie detector machine to determine if someone is lying. Professionals, like detectives, need to have the ability to recognize when someone is telling the truth.

Over time, these experts have developed the skills to look for certain indicators that can give away when someone is stretching the truth. There are many things to observe, but we’ll focus on just a few of the most effective strategies here.

If you’ve ever told a lie — and let’s be honest (pun totally intended!), everyone lies occasionally — you may have noticed that it can make you feel uneasy. This discomfort can manifest in various physical ways.

For instance, one obvious sign of lying is avoiding eye contact. Looking away from the person you’re speaking to may help alleviate feelings of guilt.

Another physical indication of lying is incongruent gestures. If you shrug your shoulders or shake your head while making a statement, your body might be subconsciously telling the truth while your words say otherwise.

Arguably the most difficult physical sign of lying to conceal is facial expressions. Have you ever heard the phrase “it’s written all over your face”? There’s certainly some truth to that saying.

People trained to detect lies watch for microexpressions, which are very brief facial expressions (approximately one twenty-fifth of a second) that reveal a hidden emotion.

For example, if something angers you, but you pretend it doesn’t, a quick moment of anger may flash across your face before you force a smile to cover it up. If someone notices that microexpression, they may realize you’re lying.

Experts advise, however, that microexpressions don’t always hide lies. Sometimes people simply try to conceal their emotions for various reasons. This serves as a good reminder that not all physical reactions you observe indicate that someone is lying.

That’s why it’s crucial to engage your mind as well! Consider the information you’re given. Do you notice any inconsistencies in their story? Does their narrative seem illogical or include parts that don’t make sense? If things don’t add up, it’s likely they aren’t true.

Experts also suggest trusting your intuition. You typically know those closest to you very well. A sudden change in expected behavior can be a strong indication of deceit.

Don’t worry if you struggle to detect when someone is lying. Even though there are numerous signs and signals to watch for, it’s not as simple as it may seem. Experts say most people aren’t proficient at spotting lies. That’s why experts require extensive training to develop this skill.

Try It Out

Are you prepared to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? Make sure to explore the following activities with a friend or family member:

  • How skilled are you at detecting lies? Test yourself with the assistance of a friend or family member. Have them select a fact about the past that you’re unaware of. Then ask them to tell you four statements, three of which are false and only one of which is the chosen fact. Can you identify the true statement? Play again, but this time have them mix one lie among three true statements. Keep playing until you feel you’re improving at spotting lies!
  • Being able to detect lies is a valuable skill for a police detective, but what other professions could benefit from this specialized skill? Brainstorm with a friend or family member. Can you think of at least five other professions where detecting lies would be highly advantageous?
  • Do you place a high value on honesty? Find out by keeping track of your statements for a day. Keep a journal and write a brief summary of any lies you tell throughout the day. Can you explain why you tell these lies? How else could you handle the situations where you find yourself being less than truthful? Seek the help of a friend or family member to understand why lying can be harmful.

Wonder Sources

  • http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/10-ways-catch-liar#1
  • https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-tell-if-someone-is-lying/
  • http://www.businessinsider.com/how-to-tell-someones-lying-by-watching-their-face-2016-1/#eyes-darting-back-and-forth-1

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